Ladies,is it dishonesty or ignorance?-full piece

Even if at all they will, very few girls will openly admit that they do it for the money. The majority will quickly rebut with colorful reasons why they won’t look out for the money in choosing a partner. They would even opt to give a two-hour unsolicited lecture on the dangers of using money as the standard of choosing a life partner. Vocal as they are in driving home their point, they will use personality profile illustrations, both biblical and historical allusions and weave it all up with an impeccable grammar making you lose sight of the fact that they are playing mere drama.

I have encountered and interacted with variety of ladies at varied levels. Though these ladies differ in terms of age, class, tribe, nationality, religion and in their individual being, they seem to have almost the same opinion. In one of my media and society lectures last semester, the lecturer asked the wonderful congregation of ladies in my class what they look out for in a man before considering him for a life partner. As if the question had leaked a day before the start of the class and as though they had debated the same topic the previous night and have come to a right consensus, their well-rehearsed responses were almost an halleluiah chorus; “I do not mind if the guy has money or not, all I need is that he should be able to take good care of me”.  “What exactly do you mean when you say he should be able to take good care of you?” the lecturer interjected. I would have personally broken the rules in the class to seek clarification if the lecturer failed to ask the follow up question but he did. One after the other the ladies started mentioning the various components of what they meant by “taking good care of me”. He should always be there for me anytime I need him, he should always call me to check on me, he should pay regular visits, he should take me out occasionally, he should have a good character, he should make me feel comfortable, he should have big dreams among others were some of the responses that came from various angles of the class. Apparently, the rest of the class was satisfied with their responses but for me, P D Wedam, I refuse to allow them throw dust into my eyes and here are my reasons. For me, no matter how you look at it, the money is the determining factor and all the responses indirectly hinge on the money. What do you make of these? 

My dear ladies,

You want him to spend much of his time with you, knowing fully well that TIME IS MONEY yet you have the guts to say, ‘I don’t care about the money’? Something must be wrong with you.

You say you don’t necessarily need a guy with money but you only need a guy with big dreams knowing very well that EVERY DREAM HAS A PRICE TO PAY. Are you not aware that the bigger the dreams you want him to have directly correspond to the price you want him to pay?

 If indeed you do not care about the money, why then do you insists that your boyfriend CALLS YOU THREE TIMES EACH DAY just to check on you? Don’t you know the airtime costs money? Don’t raise your eye brows in objection because we know you too well. The fact is, boys call their girlfriends to check on them but girls only call their boyfriends to find out why they have not called. Undisputed!!

part 2

You say the money does not matter, you only need a happy partner but you have so soon forgotten that it’s food that determines the mood of man and manna only fell from heaven just once in man’s history. Thereafter, we fed ourselves by buying and selling and I guess you what that means. Or should I still tell you that food is bought?

You know very well that comfort comes at a high cost yet you claim it is not because of the money but the comfort. Don’t we all know how uncomfortable life is without money, so what then is your point if you say that the money doesn’t matter? Perhaps you need some education.

You say you don’t care about the money yet you just broke up with your ex-boyfriend because he did not BUY A PRESENT FOR YOU ON YOUR BIRTHDAY. I guess you were expecting him to present himself as a present to you? And now, you just gave in to the guy next in the waiting line only after he took you out to have fun on Valentine’s Day but you still have convinced yourself you are not interested in the money.

You said he disgraced you for showing up at your friend’s birthday party in fairly worn-out old-fashioned clothes. What were you thinking, that your boyfriend is a regular benefactor of that charity foundation that gives fashion aids? I wish there was one like that!

If you really don’t care about the money then why did you turn that guy’s proposal down because he has bushy hair, has bad breath and has body odour? Don’t you see that detergents, cosmetics, razors and sanitizers are displayed in shelves of shops with price tags?

Your ex-boyfriend did not roll in the hay (have sex) with you because you argued that it was improper to do it in the room he shares with his younger brothers. You claim it is unsafe to do it at a friend’s place either, and you ceaselessly promise him that you’ll gladly let him in when he gets his own place. Do you need to be told that the country in which you live does not have a free housing policy before you begin to realize it costs a lot of money to own a personal room? And now that he has thrown in the towel out of impatience, it has suddenly become proper and safe for you to be screwed in hotels. Do you know the number of people who share that hotel room and bed?

So next time you admire that guy, no! not that guy, I mean next time you admire me for my looks, character, attitude, brains or whatever it is that attracts you, remember I did not acquire all that by chance; so much investment went into it and it’s obviously not stones but money.

And next time a girl tells you she does not care about the money, pause a moment and think about those who love broth and hate meat. Think about those who love to dream but hate to sleep. Think of the courts that sentence 60-year old criminals to 90 years imprisonment and still ask them to be grateful because it could have been life sentence. Think about the pastor who preaches a promising paradise yet he prays for long life or better still, think of those who want to go to heaven but fear to die and you would understand the ladies better.

I do not intend to initiate a global inter-sex debate, all that I am saying is that, in this day and age nobody ever survives without money. It therefore stands to reason that MONEY IS LIFE, even though to some extent money cannot buy life. But it can buy all the "buyable" things you ladies look out for in your ideal men. #Myleakedthought#2014

#spoken word version under construction#